The fine line between a Stranger and a Friend

I have forgotten how much I enjoy making friends. Today I'm reminded that the line between a "stranger" and a "friend" is very fine. And it doesn't take much from us at all. Just a simple hello ~ or a Yakult.

That's how I made a new friend today. 

I was shopping at Holland Village on my day off. I bought some dresses from a shop. As I was making my payment, the shop owner said, "I'm Dorothy." I said, "I'm Pam." And just like that, a friendship was born. 

As I was walking home after dinner with my parents, I heard someone call out from behind, "Pam!" I spun round and there was Dorothy, bounding out of 7-Eleven with a pack of Yakult.

"I wanted to buy one, but they only sell it in a pack," she said, as she twisted one from the pack and handed it to me. I took the Yakult from her, and we strolled back to her shop together. 

Dorothy's (shop) neighbour joined us as he was having his dinner. Her colleague Ying Ying as well. And there we were - all four of us - chatting & laughing around the table like we'd known each other for years. 

In the midst of conversation, it struck me how often I've walked past that row of shops, never pausing to think that there's a little "community" of business owners here. Each with a story. Each with a passion, pursued. Each, a person.  

I left there over an hour later with a spring in my step. A little confused. A little amused. But greatly inspired by the simplicity of how a friendship can begin ~ with anyone. 

And just like that, today turned out to be a day out of the ordinary for me. Because I'm reminded that there are absolutely no limits to whom I choose to extend a bridge of friendship to. 

Giving Thanks @ Christmas!

For me, Christmas is like Thanksgiving ~ partly cos we don't celebrate Thanksgiving here. 

And when I think back on 2008, I truly thank God for Vanilla. 

For the amazing team I had the privilege to work with, who poured their heart & soul into a magazine that was definitely more than a magazine...

 

The Vanilla team at our farewell dinner ~ minus Shaan who was out of town & clueless.

For the awesome Vanilla cover girls I got to meet & know, and who continue to inspire me with their lives... I'm thankful for the deep friendships we have formed. 

For Fongfan, Jennifer & Joel - our creative team - who gave Vanilla its look. The 200 per cent they poured into each issue & the standard of excellence they set. 

More so, they've become treasured friends in my life. 

For our readers & supporters who flood our mailbox with letters each month ~ who inspire us with their sharings! How many magazines can boast of readers like ours??? 

Our magazine may no longer be in the market, but the spirit of Vanilla lives on. And I'm thankful for this online community that continues to keep the Vanilla essence alive. 

So THANK YOU for blessing my life. You have enriched it and made me better for it. Here's wishing all of you a blessed & love-filled Christmas!!! 

 

unofficial post

Something short and just a trial post before resting.

Firstly thank you Threez for letting me write here and it looks so easy as compared to years ago.
2ndly welcome to the blog Lynne! (does any1 remember lynne?)

To me this blog serves as a reminder that although vanilla is not in the market now, it is a legend and if anyone is reading this and wants to pass it on pls do. This is a living legend and it will be for a very long time.

Off to rest.
D!

Letting Go

At this juncture in my life, 

I finally feel ready to LET GO of something I've been hanging on to for far too long, 

something that is clearly going nowhere. 

Yet there is uncertainty about whether I'm making the right decision ~ for everyone.

Is it enough to listen to my heart and trust my instincts? 

Is there such a thing as a "right" and "wrong" decision? 

If so, will I ever know if I've made the "right" one for everyone? 

Things are as simple or as complicated as we make them out to be. 

Maybe it's a matter of making a decision. 

Then beginning the process of letting go? 

 

Little Ripples of Love

Now that I'm with a news station and face the news everyday, I am beginning to see the big picture unfold over time. I've never been so in touch with world & local news before (didn't bother), and really, I must say it's making me feel down.

It's like this dark cloud hanging over everyone. I have friends who are breadwinners, just waiting for their turn to be axed. I have friends in entertainment whose work is affected because there are just less people going out, less tourists coming in.

Like Karen, I worry for my dad who travels to India several times a year (again this month), and thinks we are over-reacting when we tell him it's dangerous. There's just so much fear & uncertainty. And it's not just in Singapore but around the world.

Then recently, Ros & Yu Seung invited me to a presentation of their Enduro Africa trip. It was held at Eden Sanctuary ~ a simple gathering where they shared a slide show with friends & sponsors and thanked everyone. And as I was sitting there listening to them and soaking it in, I felt my heart swell. Here's positive energy for a change. Good news.

Hai-Yen came later, and it was great to see her! We stayed on to watch the video again, catch up, and just hang out till way after the event was over. Hai-Yen is still at it, by the way... the big-hearted energiser bunny who simply can't sit still.

Me with Hai-Yen (yellow) and Ros at the Enduro Africa post-event presentation @ Eden Sanctuary.

She is organising the All-Femme Boot Camp again early next year (postponed because of BKK's unstable situation), at Lao Liang Island. Last year, she brought a bunch of girls from the Andrew & Grace Home up to Krabi for the Airport Run. What an experience it must have been for the girls!

And Hai-Yen is still very much in touch with the girls from AG Home. Just last week, when Val & Kheng's teen musical "It' My Life!" started playing at the University Cultural Centre, Hai-Yen helped to rally the Vanilla cover girls to sponsor the AG Home girls tickets to watch the play. Well, the response was wonderful, and these are the girls we sponsored to go....

The Vanilla cover girls & friends sponsored all these teenage girls from Andrew & Grace Home to watch the musical "It's My Life!" that Val & Kheng Hua produced. 

These things make my heart do a happy dance. Because nothing in these depressing times is going to stop our Vanilla girls from creating little ripples of love in their corners of the world.

For Better or Worse, For Here or There

this is a long post. very sorry. but i think it's something we feel sometimes, esp with those we love.

Swee Chong got home on Monday morning, safe, hungry, and full of bangles for the girls. i would show a photo of him but...i donno how to do leh...

Swee Chong is not only an excellent obs/gyn consultant, he also researches into cervical cancer. he's travelled to all parts of the world, either with KK Hospital (where he works) or by invitation from WHO. he's lectured and performed operations in South America, India and villages in China, as well as in Europe. i give general continents cos i can't remember all the cities, haha, never mind that it's my job to remember things.

but that night, i was furious when he said that he was invited to Tanzania (over Chinese New Year, mind you) to speak. i got furiouser and furiouser (apologies to Lewis Carroll) when he said that Tanzania was actually quite safe, WHO had assured him, etc etc.

you know what came next: how do you really know it's safe? have you been Tanzania? people would say Mumbai was safe too, but is it now? Bangkok? America? Bali? how do you know? how will you ever know? why do you have to do this??

and of course he does it because he has to, it's in his blood and his heart. i am a little angry still cos i know he will go ahead with his plans (Type A, ACS, eldest son, Teochew, conservative Bible-Presbytarian...do i stand a chance?). and i am a little angry cos i understand his decision, and i hate that!! haha. 

how will we ever know? we never will, until it's done, and it's wonderful, or it's done, and it's too late. he's not a soldier going to Timor Leste, but because of the madness the world has taken on, he's become a soldier in a different type of war, where bringing change to people struck by poverty and sickness, could well bring danger to himself.

but before i drown in the unknown, i must float on what i do know. 

in 2003, when SARS struck, Chong was the only KK doctor who volunteered to work at the obs/gyn ward in Tan Tock Seng. he was paired with another doctor who went unwillingly, some of them weeping. for about 3 weeks, our home was a battle zone, with him stripping of his clothes at the door and all of us being incredibly careful. his own colleagues were shocked at his decision, some even telling me that i can't know what SARS is, else i wouldn't have let him go. as i write this, i am full of angry tears still.

this is the man i married. i married him for a great number of other reasons, but this amazing, humble, fearless side came up only after. he has proven again and again that the work he believes in produces the results that he wants - greater awareness of cervical cancer, better health care, more living women.

other doctors weep and feel sorry for themselves, and protect themselves first; Chong doesn't have time to do that. i married him for better or for worse, in sickness and health, til death we part. Africa is nothing compared to what i feel for him. i still don't want him to go, but i won't stop him.

i hope you all support me in this too.

thank you for reading this. 

much love.